growth

Baby Ham 11 weeks 6 days

Today was our/my first OB appointment as a "pregnit" lady, and to boot I got to see my little ham again. We got to see the baby for a few minutes, see it wiggle and shake and flail its arms, and hear its heartbeat too. It was so amazing and once again I got all teary. It just seems so surreal and it still really hasn't hit me. The baby was/is so beautiful, and it was just so amazing/weird that that little thing is growing and moving around somewhere in there. I really enjoy getting to see the baby, I think it helps me a lot to remember that I'm not just sick for any old reason, or tired, or whatever...it's really hard to fell attatched when you don't really look or feel pregnant (apart from feeling sick) and you can't feel the baby either. I'm a big fan of the ultrasounds!

When the ultrasound was over, and with a swift congratulations my doctor proceeded to leave the room. What? I was pretty sure I needed some professional answers to the 6 weeks of questions I had been working on. It was so strange and a little bit of a let down. She has always been so good about taking time with me in the past, I hope that the visit was more of a reflection of how busy they were that day, and not how the rest of the pregnancy and birth will go. I had a million questions to ask her, like, "why does it hurt when I sit down?", "how many attendants can I have at the birth,?", "why am I getting sicker as I approach the 2nd trimester?", "I'm concerned I'm not getting enought of veggies and protein"....She did okay our doula (Cybil!!), but mentioned right away how sometimes doulas can be more concerned about the "experience" of birth, rather than the safety of the baby and mom. (whatever) We ended the appiointment with Thomas getting ito a little hissy fit with the receptionist/nurse/lady, and me just sitting there like the monkey in the middle. If it weren't for the fact that she still had the picture of my little baby I would've booked it. It was that uncomfortable...I think they were on to us...all in all I'd say it was a bust (apart from seeing little baby ham that is). I meet with my nurse midwife on friday ( I guess even if you requested a dr. that's who you'll be seeing at Kaiser) so hopefully she'll be able to answer my questions (and run labs!).